I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
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