yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
Randomize
