I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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