Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
Randomize
