he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize
