On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Randomize
