so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
Randomize
