In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
oh god was she eating orange peels again
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
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