I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
