I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
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