Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
