I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
I think a kid would responsible me up
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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