used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
Randomize
