My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Randomize
