she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
Why are there so many empty soda cans in my room?
You put them in a circle around your bed and said it was the best way to ward of the witches from hocus pocus....then you remembered you needed salt too. I'm assuming you havent gone to the bathroom yet.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
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