New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
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