Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
Randomize
