The girls stopped by my apartment. They caught me naked with a nearly empty bottle of vodka in one hand, drawing crop circles in the carpet with the vacuum.
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
Randomize
