You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
Randomize