That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
