She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Randomize
