Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
Randomize
