i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
I feel like abortions should bother me more
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
Randomize
