I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
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