Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
Randomize
