K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
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