Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(512): View more from Texas

just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?

(1-512): View more from Texas

pretty standard. you have fun last night?

(512): View more from Texas

apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?

(1-512): View more from Texas

typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.

Fav 8 1869 894
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(503): View more from Oregon

It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator

Fav 2 1345 809
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(402): View more from Nebraska

2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.

Fav 4 1889 908
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(732): View more from New Jersey

look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates

Fav 1 584 866
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(415): View more from California

don't take this the wrong way, but I'm not drunk but I need you to take me to the ER and you're the most likely to not be drunk now.

Fav 0 26 7
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