i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
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