direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
Randomize