What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
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