his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
