just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
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