I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
Thanks for jumping on that grenade for me last night. You're the best wingman ever
She ate 7 of the 8 slices of pizza. I deserve a purple heart and sex w your sister
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
Randomize
