The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize
