He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
i think i just lost a toe
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize