I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Randomize
