remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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