Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Randomize