thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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