Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
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