pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
I wish they made helmets for livers.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
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