So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
No stitches, just platelets and will power
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Randomize
