All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Randomize