i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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