I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Randomize
