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• (417): View more from Missouri

  Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.

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• (903): View more from Texas

  I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.

  (214): View more from Texas

  kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.

  (903): View more from Texas

  I'll be there in 10

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• (807): View more from Ontario

  Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?

  (1-807): View more from Ontario

  Just flip the mattress, it erases all

  (807): View more from Ontario

  Done and done

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• (305): View more from Florida

  It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.

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• (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.

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• (314): View more from Missouri

  It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.

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• (360): View more from Washington

  Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?

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• (315): View more from New York

  I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.

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• (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that

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• (440): View more from Ohio

  Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.

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• (330): View more from Ohio

  I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay

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• (651): View more from Minnesota

  He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(

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• (631): View more from New York

  found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day

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• (937): View more from Ohio

  Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo

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• (315): View more from New York

  He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!

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