i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Randomize
