I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
Randomize
