I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Randomize