D3 body, D1 cock
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
How external is "for external use only"?
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
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